Imitate Your Identity

P.T. Barnum was a genius. Around 1835, when white people would pay good money to see other white people in black face pretending to be black people but would not pay a cent to see an actual black person dance, Barnum rubbed burnt cork on the face of William Henry Lane and stuck a black wig on his head. William Henry Lane was already black. And so with the help of Lane, who managed a better imitation of a black man than any white man had yet done, he cleaned up. Barnum’s level of dishonesty and sheer chutzpah was perhaps never exceeded in America until Donald Trump decided to don his orange coif and run for president. It’s a shame, however, that the glory days of the circus are over. He’ll make a shitty president. He’d make a shitty clown. But he might do a damn good job as a barker.

Trump's Follies

I keep hearing the people on the news contorting themselves trying to use Trump’s words to find out what he really believes. They’re trying to do their job. But the task is hopeless. He doesn’t have beliefs. He has interests. What is good for Trump is good; what is bad for Trump is bad. And these things change every day. If a rigged election is good for Trump, the election was rigged. If it’s bad for Trump, it wasn’t rigged. The dangers of this monomania are legion. He’ll be making long term decisions to stoke short term piques. On a hot summer day, he’ll install an air conditioner that can’t be turned off. It’ll run all winter. He’ll install a heater to counteract the air conditioner. And he won’t be able to turn that off either. So next summer he’ll need a bigger air conditioner and next winter a bigger heater.